"Oh You Should Write This!!"

I love my mom, she's very supportive of what I want to do and helps me to do it.  But sometimes she has moments where she just doesn't get it.

For example:  Last night at her birthday dinner we were sitting around chatting, cause that's what people do around the table, and I forget exactly what we were talking about but she said: You'll write it and your brother will illustrate it!

She says this often.  I usually just sigh.  I know she means well, but the fact of the matter is: I have so many story ideas in my head, that nothing related to my life will ever make it into book form.  Only in blog form!  I have so many stories in fact that I know I won't get them all written down while I'm alive.  It also bothers me that she always includes my brother.  I love my brother, he's a great artist, out of practice, but definitely has talent. I have nothing against him, and I know he knows this.  But every time my mom suggest: oh he can illustrate it.  I can't help but think:  Why does he have to be included in what I want to do?  (And I know my brother's cool with it, he usually just looks at me and shakes his head).

See, sometimes I find it very hard to be the youngest.  My mom's very good at including us both, but sometimes I'd really rather she didn't.  I want to write for me.  Not cause I want to be published, not because it'd be cool to say: I'm an author (with severe writer's block).  But because it's a way for me to express myself, get away from the world, and just enjoy what I see in my head.

I do want to get published.  I have big goals and big dreams, and sure I have moments of: Wouldn't it be cool if a book I publish gets made into a movie??  Who doesn't have those moments?  But that's not my motivation.

My motivation is wanting to write down these ideas that are brewing in my head and absolutely refuse to leave me alone.  I want people to get to know the characters in my head, to love them like I do, to feel with and for them.  Heck I want make people cry, be angry, happy, excited, terrified, etc.  I want to make people feel, because I've realized that's what I read for.  That's what I watch movies for.  I need to feel.  I also really want to help the people like me, the reluctant readers who just (at first) can't stand reading.  I want to provide an entrance into the wonderful world of books so people can see just how wonderful it is to step into a world sprung from the imagination of another, and have that world become precious to them.  (Not precious like being tempted by the one ring, cause that'd be creepy).

But I also want to be able to finally look at a hard copy of something I created.  Something I toiled over, cried over, fussed over, and poured everything I had in it.  And I want it to be mine.  I know it won't be my efforts alone that will bring that to pass (eg editors, publishers, agents, friends, family, etc)  I know they'll have a part.  But the creative side needs to be mine.

I don't know if my mom does it because she's worried my brother might regret not taking his shot at being an NHL goalie, and wants him to have a chance at fame.  But I think that's what really bugs me.  Maybe she misunderstands what an author's motivation is (or should be).  We don't write to get rich (most author's aren't).  We don't write to be famous (again, most author's aren't).  We write because we have a story (or stories) that need to get out and won't leave our thoughts.  We also write because we're crazy and are into self inflicted pain (it can be seriously painful to write).  It's not an easy process, it's not a quick process.  But it's a part of our souls and it's near and dear, and it's something that needs to be ours.

I know I'll get that dang story in my head out on paper, I know it.  I think that's also why I'm so gosh darned intimidated by it (finally figured it out btw).  It's big, it's special and it's mine.  And one day I'll introduce you to that world and the people who shape it.

Riding Through the Woods

What can be better than riding through the woods, with friends and gorgeous weather?

Not much, except doing it for a good cause!  Yesterday I tagged along with some friends for a Poker Run for the Heart and Stroke foundation!! (Though I fail at raising donations, and forgot for numerous consecutive weeks to actually raise some money... my bad).

The weather was gorgeous, the trails were covered with leaves, and my trusty steed was her usual perfect trail riding horse self.  (Never even noticed the horse eating rocks and culverts).

We usually end up bringing up the rear on trail rides.  We were second in line for about... a minute?  But were overtaken again.  But I don't mind cause then I can take pictures of everyone else.

Sadly we did not get the winning hand.  Which sucks cause we were one card away from a flush, which would've been the best hand!  It had to be the last card too.  I tried to swap it for a club but the guy just wouldn't let me.

Oh well!

Now off to my nephew's baptism and then off to church!

Wheeeeee

So this week I dove head first into the Mark of Athena and did not re-emerge until I finished.  (The usual with a new book).

Must say: Wow!  Wow, wow, wow!!  It was fantastic!  Plenty suspenseful and even a bit scary!  (And by a bit, I mean terrifying.  One word: spiders).

I will also be cursing that horrible cliffhanger for the next year.  I am also worried how my nerves will be at the end of two more books to this series.  If I'm a raving lunatic you'll know.

But definitely highly recommend.  BUT if you haven't yet been introduced to this wonderful world, you must start at the beginning.  Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief beginning, and then read that series, then you can start on the Heroes of Olympus series.  Go forth and conquer.

In other news I stumbled upon an oh duh moment this week.

Usually while I work, I daydream about some pretty epic stuff.  Dragons, sword fights, etc.  And then it suddenly hit me:  why don't I write these down???

I've been trying to find ways to do a little bit of writing every day.  My writing muscles have been extremely shot lately, but I couldn't figure out how to work them out.

So I pulled out my phone and started writing while I was filling water buckets.  I ACTUALLY WROTEDED!! :D  And even more excitedly for the first time in a loooooooong time, the scene actually ran away with me and surprised even me.

Oh boy it felt good!

Once I transfer it onto my compy and do some edits, I will post it here... Potentially.  Or keep it secret until it explodes into a full length story of some kind.  (No clue, just writing it cause it's there).

But I will tell you that it involves dragons and sci fi.

And a dance club.