Being Brave

No sense beating around the Bush anymore so I'm just going to say it:

I've left the Church. (the mormon one for those who dont know).

I know it's a crappy way for some of you to find out, but this way I can get my thoughts out.

First I want to say that I do not regret joining the church. It came at a time when I needed hope, and I've met many wonderful people through it.

That being said, there's a lot that's wrong with it. And if it's supposed to be true, that shouldn't be the case should it?

I can't remember where or when exactly I found out, but I learned that the church put forth funding to make sure proposition 8 was passed. This both enraged and disgusted me. What right did they have to interfere in others lives like that? And using, I'm guessing, money from tithing to do it? What happened to agency? Free will? The actions spoke very differently than the words.

And it left a disquiet in my soul. Which then opened the way for some clear and concise thinking, which I hadn't allowed myself to do in years.

So many things I'd piled onto my shelf came topping down, and after barely any effort came across a lot of information about the church that completely discredits their claim of truth. I've also spoken with people I trust, and have very quickly learned I'm among many who left not because of sin, but because we realized we'd been lied to.

After a lot of reading and a scary afternoon of contemplating the potential damming of my soul, I decided that I was going to leave.

Years if guilt and doubt washed away and I was left feeling free and in control. And that's how it should be. We are in control of ourselves, completely. We do not need religion to dictate every aspect of our lives, especially not our underwear.

See, for a while I've wondered why people weren't more willing to accept the truth of the church. But it's because it does not hold up to serious inquiry. Evidence quickly debunks so much of it. And the god they claim to be so merciful and dull of unconditional love? If that's the case, why are there so many steps to follow and rules to obey to get into the highest glory? Which, even if it turns out to be true, I'd rather be with my family and those I care about.

I'm looking forward to my wedding again. Where my family can see their only daughter get married. As it should be. It's about family isn't it? Why must it be so exclusive?

I could go on and on and perhaps I'll touch on the subject again. But for now this is all I have to say. I know I made the right decision because for the first time in years I'm very comfortable in my own skin and I no longer have to solicit my thoughts.